Fuze Agave Cactus

The convenience store near where I catch the bus in the morning has a really random selection of juices. One the one hand they get things like Sprecher’s, and they have five flavors of Snapple that seem to be chosen by someone wearing a blindfold (they have Go Bananas, but I’m the same about banana-flavored stuff; also grapeade and diet peach tea, but no regular tea, peach or otherwise; kiwi-strawberry, but no lemonade). And then they have Veryfine orange juice and grape juice. So you see my dilemma: I can either go totally pedestrian or totally wacked out; it’s not a real wide cross-section. So this morning I ended up with a Pepsi Blue, which you know I absolutely adore, but granted is maybe not the best thing to be drinking at 7:20 in the A.M. I mean I’ve still got the rest of the day to contend with.

Dream job: working for a major chain of supermarkets, deciding what juices and sodas to stock. I pound the pavement, seeking out the hot new beverages. I’ve got Nantucket Nectars on my speed dial. College girls in swimsuits stop by the office to drop off free samples and cajole me into choosing their product. Can I get a what what.

Last night, though. Oh man. I was at the crunchy granola supermarket and picked up a juice called Fuze Agave Cactus. You know how sometimes you buy a new album and you love it so much that you don’t want to even tell anyone about it? You just want to lock your door and stay in your bedroom all night, lying on the floor, reading the lyrics and liner notes, listening to the album over and over? It was exactly like that.

It didn’t taste like actual cactus much. (When I lived in Somerville there was a great mexican place down the street, and they put cactus in all their salads. It’s actually a really tasty vegetable.) It was non-carbonated, sweet but not thick. The slippery consistency kind of reminded me of Gatorade, but in a good way. It tasted almost lemon-limey with some orange highlights, but really I think we might be dealing with a new flavor phylum here: I don’t have the words for it.

I’m just really jazzed about it. Can’t wait to scoop up some more. I’m Joe Sincerity over here, hands to high heaven.

One thought on “Fuze Agave Cactus”

  1. I must say, Snapple has an Agave flavored drink too. I believe it was called Rain. Maybe it was AriZona. But, I do agree- it’s very good. Or it was. I haven’t seen it in quite a long time.

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